Me, explaining Halloween to the Alien: It's gonna be great, Al. We get to go to all the houses in the neighborhood and yell, "Trick or treat!" We'll get lots of candy...and lots of compliments on how great we look. I tell ya, Al, it's gonna be great! Halloween is a real ego booster. You're gonna love it!
Al: What's the trick part?
Me: Not everyone gives out candy. Some people don't turn their porch lights on. Others tell you they ran out of candy. For all of those party-poopers, you get to play a trick on them. And this year, it's going to be the best trick of all.
Al: Why's that?
Me: Because those fools are the ones that you get to take home with you to your planet. You get research subjects...we get the neighborhood cleaned up!
